Communication is not only listening. It is also about expressing oneself in such a way, that the other side wants to listen to us. Basically, this involves the right choice of words, appropriate formulation of our message and avoidance of statements that cause the listener to assume a defensive posture. The more comfortable our client feels with us, the more favorably they will react to what we say to them and what we ask of them.
Many people exhibit the weakness of talking a lot and taking delight in their speeches, but failing to notice that others have stopped listening to them. The way in which we express our disagreement is important. Objections and disagreements are necessary. Nevertheless, expressing them requires tact, gentleness and sensitivity. If expressed improperly, disagreement may produce reluctance and resistance in the client. Everyone has a certain image of themselves, which is synthesized from their aspirations, experiences and the evaluation of those close to them. Therefore, in the course of a conversation we should avoid damaging their self-esteem. People take many decisions in order to protect their self-image, or strengthen it. If we know how the client evaluates themselves, we can make specific assumptions concerning their motivation and reaction to future events. It is better to strengthen their self-image than to lower it, because then they will try to adjust themselves to our vision of who they are.